Wednesday, July 20, 2005

The Worst Country Music Lyrics of All Time

And thats saying alot.
I don't know the name of the song or whos sings it. It's something about comparing Heaven to aspects of daily life. Like "If heaven was a ___ it would be a ____". Its supposed to be a moving, emotional song, I think. Maybe it is, right up to a point.
A few days ago at work we were having our pre-meal meeting and this song was on the radio. We're al just standing there talking when this beaut drops-
"If heaven was a pie, it'd be cherry"
Seriously the whole meeting just stopped dead as we all looked around at eachother as if to say, "What? What did he just say?"
I mean, come on I know it's country music but hold yourself to some kind of standard.
He later almost tops that with "If heaven were a train, I bet it'd be a fast one!"

Yeah, I bet it'd be bitchin' fast.

1 Comments:

At 10:27 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Here are all the lyrics if anyone was interested. The cherry pie analogy is about the weirdest I've ever heard.
If heaven was an hour, it would be twilight
When the fireflies start their dancin on the lawn
And suppers on the stove and mammas laughin
And everybodys workin day is done

If heaven was a town it would be my town
On a summer day in 1985
And everything i wanted was out there waiting
And everyone i loved was still alive

Chorus:
Dont cry a tear for me now baby
There comes a time we must all say goodbye
And if thats what heavens made of
You know i ain't afraid to die

If heaven was a pie it would be cherry
Cool and sweet and heavy on your tongue
And just one bite would satisfy your hunger
And thered always be enough for everyone

If heaven was a train it sure would be a fast one
That could take this weary travler round the bend
And if heaven was a tear it'd be my last one
And youd be in my arms again

Chorus:
Dont cry a tear for me now baby
There comes a time we must all say goodbye
And if that's what heaven's made of
You know i ain't afraid to die
Beany

 

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